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*Your mileage may vary. Some quotes are puns, or require historical or technical literacy to appreciate. If you miss the humor, please re-read the Internet and then try again.
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The ogre eyes you with a funny look, then shrugs and lifts you onto his shoulders. You almost faint (not only do body odors rise, but the ogre has his arms raised to keep you balanced!).
You are in the ogre's lair. Passageways lead to the north and west. The ogre eyes you affectionately.
You are perched on the shoulders of an ogre.